Friendship

Proverbs 17:17 – A friend loves at all times, and is born, as is a brother, for adversity.

I recently encountered a situation that briefly got me off track. I shared it with a few friends. Within minutes, I was laughing about the situation that occurred, and the irony of the fact that the enemy tried to attack immediately after I posted a blog about winning no matter what.

Fortunately, I know that the enemy can only attack us through our mind. When this happens, the moment we recognize it, I have found that there are two things that help me to get on the right track.

First, I stand on what God says and not what the enemy is trying to get me to believe. We must stop in our tracks and remember to do what 2 Corinthians 10:5 says. “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” Joyce Meyer says that we need to think about what we are thinking about. She is correct. So many times, I have found myself dwelling on something, allowing my mind to go down a wrong path. I am learning to recognize it more quickly and to take that thought captive and think about things that are good.

There are times when that is a lot easier said than done, and additional measures are required. That is when I must proceed with step 2.

I share the situation with my closest and most trusted friends. My circle. These are godly women who I trust completely and can be vulnerable with. I love the fact that God has blessed me with just the right people in my life, and I love the different approaches that they all take to help guide me back to the right path.

There are a couple of friends that I can call on, and I am amazed with the way they can quote scripture. They are always able to give me what I need when I need it, and back it up with God’s Word. At the same time, they are very real and understand the reality of our human journey. I am never made to feel bad about the way I may be feeling at the time, or any mistakes that I have made.

Then there is the friend who listens to me and responds with the best…pardon me for this…the most thuggish and hard-core response that she can. Usually, it is just two words. I won’t share it here, but I am sure you get the idea. I love friends who can bring the perfect mixture of classy and sassy. The ones that I can listen to both Tupac and Kirk Franklin with, and there is no judgement. When she responds, in my head I’m like Chris Tucker’s character Smokey at the end of the movie Friday when Craig beats up Deebo. “That’s my dawg!” God is working on us. This is the friend who will drop everything, hop on a flight, and spend a week with me just to see for herself that I am all good.

In between are a few others that fall within the range of the ones that I described. I just realized that when I say a few others, I truly mean it. Some people cannot say that they have even one loyal friend, and I have been blessed with a handful.

I also love that my friends allow me to be fully human and verbalize the details of how petty I would like to be in some situations. I even joke and say I wish that I could have just 2 seconds to be petty without penalty, because I can do it quickly. After we laugh about it, we acknowledge that no situation or person is worth me interfering with God’s plan for my life. I’m not perfect, but most times I quickly reign it in and behave the way that a woman who trusts in God should. If I could get that 2 seconds though, I would probably take it. I am just being honest. I’m human.

What I love most about my closest friends is that they all tell me the truth. Even if it is not something that I would like to hear. They hold me accountable, and at the same time they support me and are there for me whether I do what they believe I should or not. That is true friendship. Sometimes I think of friendships that I’ve had in the past that ended or became distant for some reason or another. I saw a quote on social media that really resonated with me. “The people you lose during your healing process are only meant to be with the unhealed version of you.” I am not sure whose quote it is, but it is a good one. I have had to accept that while on this journey, people will come and go. I am thankful for the ones I referred to above as they’ve each been a part of my life for over 25 years. I am also thankful for the ones I have met in recent years who have been an important part of my journey.

When it is all said and done, friends are such a critical part of our lives. Look closely at the people you are surrounded by. Hopefully amongst them you can find a good mixture of who you are and who you want to be as you grow in your relationship with God. Surround yourself with good friends and be a good friend. God knows that this human experience is a hard one, but He wants us to enjoy our journey. Friends are one of the ways that we can do just that.

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